Sunday, February 7, 2010

Fig newtons for thanksgiving and words that rhyme with envelope

Just because you break into cars doesn't mean you're hiding your insecurities well with Linus' blanket. You're telling the world to look at you indirectly through petty crime a la the theft of a strangers' mix CDs.

I think you should be raped by your mother using a strap-on of the severed penis of your father whiling listening to Escape (The Pina Colada Song) on repeat.

And then you'll be punished for breaking into other peoples' cars!

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