"and that was the first and last time I ever made eye contact with a swarm of bees."
-- Posted from my iPhone
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Crazy shit like that.
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2010
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January
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- Firecrackers in my spicy bear soup?
- We have 8 waterloo canons and we're going to fire ...
- Dandelions help me do jumpingjacks
- I'm not gonna lie!
- They broke my nose then told me I needed to do a b...
- You want me to put my socks on? More like beef je...
- The universe ends at midnight
- Let's set fire to tarantulas and call it a day
- This cuckoo clock shimmies to the beat of a thousa...
- Something probably never been said
- Water cooler discussions that probably do not occu...
- Phrases that make little sense
- Water cooler discussions that probably do not occu...
- Fancy schmancy cupcakes with eyes and no eyelids
- We have your peaches and cream. IF YOU EVER WANT T...
- lonely cars in lonely streets filled with lonely bars
- Sunshine cracker company llc
- Here...Hold my cocoa I'm gonna punch you in the shin
- Sweet potato jubilee a la mode
- Sam I am should learn how to fucking talk
- the plot thickens...all over your face
- Glad I don't have fungus on my genitalia
- Can't talk now.
- Sure, I'll have some pancakes...wait
- So sorry for the delay. I was smacking frogs on th...
- Does deodorant ever expire
- Dick shoes
- Red fingers and green thumbs
- Balancing checkbooks
- Gallbladders in my Christmas stocking
- Bucket of fuck
- Pork chop
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January
(32)
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